May 2013
13 posts
May 18th
291,406 notes
May 18th
37,879 notes
May 18th
4,045 notes
“Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who...”
– Lemony Snicket (via langleav)
May 18th
5,828 notes
floozys: hey followers is everyone feeling okay??? do you want some tea??? hot chocolate??? *puts in your favorite movie* *wraps you in fluffy blankets* *kisses your forehead* *whispers* i love you so much i just want everyone to be happy and safe
May 18th
137,239 notes
Poppin pussies into pies.
May 18th
cristinaya: Shine bright like a washed nintendog
May 18th
75,425 notes
lea-michele: in australia we say dibber-dobber instead of tattletale this is probably the most embarrassing thing about us as a country
May 18th
252 notes
May 18th
124,960 notes
May 18th
68,612 notes
spookymormon: spookymormon: my mom always texts me rude things so ive just started replying with an emoji of an eggplant and it gets her so pissed it’s great
May 18th
70,058 notes
2 tags
Got my running clothes on. Aaaaaannddd laid on the couch.
May 18th
May 1st
8,023 notes
April 2013
1 post
4 tags
Today working as a medical secretary I had to call a patient to schedule a PET Scan. When the patient picked up and I had asked him his time preference he replied: “HOLD ON, I HAVE TO PUT ON MY LEG!” I just dont know anymore.
Apr 8th
March 2013
29 posts
Mar 25th
35,272 notes
Mar 19th
4,580 notes
Mar 18th
30,713 notes
Mar 18th
170,478 notes
3 tags
P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way Sydney
Mar 18th
Anyone who reblogs this post by March 23rd will...
ggivemetherapyy: I promise every single one of you.  I’m serious
Mar 18th
55,238 notes
Mar 18th
305 notes
4 tags
What would it be like if Batman had powers like Aquaman, and all Batman can do is call bats when somebody is committing a crime. Batman would just be a man running around at night scaring thieves with bats he called with his mind.
Mar 18th
1 note
Mar 18th
226,682 notes
Mar 15th
1,079 notes
Mar 15th
12 notes
3 tags
My pupils are so dilated that I can see into the future.
Mar 15th
2 notes
HOLY SHIT, BUT FINN TOTALLY LET BRODI HAVE IT IM...
Mar 15th
12 notes
Mar 15th
184,605 notes
Mar 15th
68,651 notes
consulting-idjits-in-the-tardis: fuck i’m falling down all these stairs Well, at least you don’t live under them. stop being so overdramatic harry
Mar 15th
135,388 notes
Mar 14th
15 notes
Mar 14th
60,549 notes
Mar 13th
47 notes
2 tags
What if our organs don’t do what we think they do? What if the stomach does the thinking and the brain does the breathing? We can digest with our lungs and smell with our eyes. Maybe even feel with our ears. The pancreas can make pee and the kidneys functions like a liver.
Mar 13th
Mar 13th
4,334 notes
Reblog If You Grew Up With This
hooliganlovatic: fangirlingawayinneverland: NOT this: kids these days are so spoiled when i was your age we had an animated disney castle intro and we had to walk uphill both ways to see it Barefoot, in the snow In a blizzard With wolves chasing us 10 miles without a coat on fire The comments on here are a big reason for why i reblogged this…too funny!
Mar 8th
219,791 notes
Mar 8th
3 notes
anonynaila: subvertcliche: mello-dramatic: Everyone who reblogs this will get the title of a book to read based on their bio/posts. Everyone. I mean it. THIS IS THE BEST POST I HAVE EVER SEEN EVER they really do mean everyone
Mar 8th
351,570 notes
Mar 6th
5,951 notes
realitybl0ws: here’s to all the kids who have never found their name on anything in a souvenir store
Mar 6th
221,886 notes
Mar 6th
127 notes
3 tags
Don’t you hate when you’re staring at a paper and just say out loud “Oh shit I’ve missed a period!” and the guy next to you and facepalms so hard he gets a concussion and passes out before he realizes you were talking about your grammar?
Mar 6th
13 notes
achoomnida: if you’re gonna unfollow me you’ll have to go through the perfume department 
Mar 5th
107,175 notes
February 2013
65 posts
Reblog if you're a "Whatever the fuck I feel like...
dust-flow: OMIGOD I REMEMBER THIS EPISODE!
Feb 26th
392,271 notes
Feb 26th
8,607 notes
Feb 26th
214,206 notes
2 tags
MICE AND GHOSTS HAVE A LOT IN COMMON. You can either hear them, or see them; never both. Both do things to make you seem crazy. Both are creepy to certain people. Both come out only at night. tl;dr mice are ghosts 
Feb 26th
fartgallery: 4/20? You mean 1/5 reduce your fractions did you even learn math
Feb 20th
192,902 notes
4 tags
As I stood in the kitchen rubbing egg yolk in my hair, it made me think how my life is one giant science experiment.  ALWAYS wear a condom. ALWAYS.
Feb 19th
Reblog if it's okay to start talking to you...
Feb 19th
154,700 notes